So, this was a first:
Last Friday, on a whim, I replied to an employment ad on kijiji (Mistake #1) looking for a "leader, not a manager" and promising a salary of $50,000 - $70,000. What the ad failed to mention was the name of the company I possibly might be employed by (Mistake #2).
On Monday I got a phone call from the mystery employer, saying they were interested in setting up an interview with me and would I be available Tuesday at 10am? Since I was in the doctors office at the time, and was having a hard time understanding the person I was speaking to, I failed to catch the name of the company, but I did get the address and the name of the person who would be interviewing me. The closing remark by the person on the phone was "This is a professional environment, so dress sharp".
That night I Google mapped the address I had been given, and based on the google street view of the building, narrowed down the names of the companies listed on the sign to the company that I thought sounded most like the name of the company I had been told on the phone. Then I found their website and read a bit about the company, and otherwise prepared for my interview.
The next morning I got up early, did some more reading about the company, and managed to find an entire forum, which, to sum it up, basically told me not to bother, this company is a joke (!!!!). I decided to ignore the forum (Mistake #3) and that even though this job might not be for me, the interview would be good practice.
I dressed "sharp", and arrived at the office which was less than profession in appearance. Dirty carpet, cheap interior decoration etc. Then I noticed that the employees, the people that would be performing my interview, looked less like professionals and more like fraternity boys in suits. (This entire paragraph is Mistake #4)
I got invited into the office for my interview by one of the frat boys, and was told that another frat boy would be sitting in on the interview. The first frat boy asked me questions, while the second frat boy sat in the corner and played on his phone. I aced the interview, and was told that I could now move onto another part of the interview process where I would learn more about the company.
This is what I learned:
I would not move directly into a "leadership" position, instead I would start at the bottom of the company, and work my way up....and be paid by commission. Oh, and I would be selling life insurance. Yeah, that sounds exactly like the position I had applied for. Not.
At this point I realized what a joke this was, and decided I would just see how far I could get....after all, it would be good practice for future interviews. I sat through an hour of promotional videos (that looked like they had been made in PowerPoint) and then I was told that I would receive a phone call that night to let me know if the rest of the "management team" wanted me to move onto the next set of interviews.
That night I got my phone call, and was asked how I felt about the company and if I would be interested in working there. I decided to put the nail in the coffin (or so I thought) and said "I dont feel that this company is a good fit for me", to which Mr. So-and-so replied "Well, the management team didn't feel like you were a good fit either". End of conversation. Wrong.
About 20 minutes later, while I was driving to my yoga class, I got another phone call from the same Mr. What's-his-name, saying that he actually wanted to talk with me some more about my cover-letter, and see if he could talk me into taking the position. Wait, I thought the "management team" didn't think I was a good fit?! I told him I was currently driving and that I would have to call him back tomorrow (playing hard to get is fun, but Mistake #5).
The next day I called him back. He wanted to know why I wasn't interested in the job. I told him that the job ad completely misrepresented the job I was actually being offered, and that I had no interest in this job.
Him: "Oh, ok, I completely understand. So, do you spent most of your time in Ottawa, or do you spent more of it in Winnipeg."
Me: (Thinking this is weird, why is this conversation still happening?) "Blah blah blah, I travel back and forth, blah blah"
Him: "Well, since it wouldn't be a conflict of interest -"
Me: (Thinking he is going to offer to give my resume to someone else he might know...)
Him: " - I was wondering if I could be so bold as to ask you out for dinner"
Me: "Im actually engaged"
Him: "...."
Him: "Well he is a lucky guy. I guess this wouldnt work then."
Me: "Yes, I think my fiance might find it a little odd"
Him: "Oh, well I wish you the best in the future. I know you will be successful in whatever you do"
Me: "Thanks, you too"
Him: "Bye...."
Me: "Bye."
CLICK.
[Insert manic laughing here]
Priceless. I cant wait to see what my next job interview ends up like!
